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The Secret To Italian Style – Fare La Bella Figura

“The Creator made Italy from designs by Michelangelo.”
Mark Twain


Have you ever wondered what is the secret to Italian style? How Italians manage stilettos on cobblestones or how they look chic and elegant at all times? After moving to Italy I discovered the secret to Italian style. The secret to Italian style is more than just dressing well. Looking good is a cultural norm learned from birth. In Italy, one learns from an early age the importance of fare la bella figura.

Italian style. A quintessential Italian woman dressed elegantly.
The quintessential Italian woman. Stylish and elegant. Photo credit: https://www.walksofitaly.com/blog/how-to/what-italians-wear-in-spring

 

FARE LE BELLA FIGURA | A GOOD FIRST IMPRESSION

Fare la bella figura” literally means ‘to make a beautiful figure.’ The phrase refers to the Italian ideal of looking your best at all times, making a good impression and is at the core of the secret to Italian style. For this casual Californian, this concept may be the biggest challenge that I faced living in Italy.  Northern Italy is the home of Milano, the seat of fashion houses and world famous designers. People are stylish there.

After moving to Italy, I was jet lagged and coming down off of an emotional roller coaster of a year. I was unaccustomed to humidity and was sopping wet every time I stepped outside.

There I was the first day of school in Italy, bedraggled, exhausted, and definitely not stylish. I hadn’t felt the need to dress up for the ten minute walk to school when I was just going home to unpack dirty, dusty boxes. I felt good about myself that I had managed to brush my hair, put on some makeup, and don my fancy Taryn Rose flip flops.

I arrived at my children’s school. I looked at all the Italian mothers and thought “uh oh.”  Not only were they thin and physically beautiful, they were stylish in an understated elegant way. Northern Italian women don’t wear a lot of makeup. They don simple, high quality, finely tailored clothes. They wear dresses, skirts and lots and lots of stilettos. And boots – year round. And scarves – year round.  I stood on the sidewalk, hair in a ponytail, wearing California athleisure wear and flip flops. Needless to say, I stood out like a sore thumb.

MUSINGS AND OBSERVATIONS | HOW DO THEY DO IT?

I pondered the secret to Italian style. Was the secret to Italian style simply having enough money to buy the best clothes? Was the secret to Italian style some special hair product that stopped your head from sweating all day long and looking like one just got out of the shower? I was determined to find out the secret to fare la bella figura.

I had a conversation with my English friend Diana about the Italian women’s seemingly effortless style. Diana noted that if you went to the supermarket in England dressed like an Italian woman does, everyone would think, “what is she trying to prove?”  I thought about how people would react if you showed up at Safeway in stilettos, a dress, a scarf – Diana was right.  Americans too would think you were putting on airs. The only reason you would wear high heels to the supermarket in America was if you were on your way to or from work or an event. In Italy, however, it a common occurrence.

I will admit, from my California perspective, it seems like a lot of work to get dressed up just to run to the supermarket, go to the gym, or walk the kids to school. But dress up Italians do. I was no longer in California and if I didn’t want to stand out I was going to have to make some changes. Wearing exercise clothes on the street is just not done in Italia, and flip flops (my shoe of choice in California) are reserved for the pool or the health club.  If I continued my disregard for la bella figura, I may offend someone or at the very least confuse them.  My American friend Sarah told me that once she went out in her “tuta” or her exercise suit with no makeup. She ran into her landlady who promptly contacted Sarah’s Italian in-laws to inquire if Sarah was feeling ill since she had been out of the house looking so casual.  In Italy, being ill is the only excuse for failing fare la bella figura.

LESSON NUMBER ONE | KNOW THY SELF

The first week I sat back and observed. I saw one woman ride up to school on her bicycle in a tight pencil skirt, gorgeous blouse and stilettos. There was a light summer rain. She rode her bicycle while holding an umbrella, one child on the back of her bike and another in the front.  She arrived, floated off of her bike, got the kids out of their seats, grabbed her Louis Vuitton bag and glided into school. Not a hair out of place. I watched – mouth agape. She couldn’t be a real mother of two small children. She looked like a super model. I looked around for a film crew. This had to be fake.

The one thing that stood out to me was her air of confidence. She was comfortable in her own skin.

So, first on the list toward achieving Italian style – feeling confident that you look good and not caring what others think. Now this seems to be incongruent with the concept of fare la bella figura, but it is not. Putting your best face forward means different things to different people. As long as you carry yourself with the confidence of an Italian woman in stilettos on a 1,000 year cobblestone street, all will be fine.

LESSON NUMBER TWO | KNOW THY PRODUCTS

I soon came to accept that not only are Italian women stylish, they don’t seem to be affected by weather. Italian women’s hair is never out of place. The weather wreaks havoc on my hair regularly. In the summer the humidity leaves my body and head wet and it renders my hair a wet, frizzy, wonky mess. In the spring, the pollen makes my eyes water and my nose run constantly leaving me looking like W.C. Fields. The wet winter rain and fog makes my eyes water resulting in black raccoon eyes from runny mascara. And again, my hair becomes a frizzy wonky mess. Why don’t Italian women suffer as I do? Is it genetics? How do they do it?

The second lesson on achieving Italian style, know your hair and powder your face. There are a number of hairstyles that one can wear to combat the weather and a number of hair products that can tame the wildest of manes.  One thing that I noticed is that it is not uncommon for Italian women to don a scarf on their heads while they are traveling. Think Sofia Loren in a convertible on the Amalfi coast. A headscarf can be tied around your hair to protect it from the weather, and then upon arrival, it can be stylishly tied around your neck, shoulders or handbag.

Also, one Italiana informed me that one simply must invest in a high quality face powder to ensure that your makeup does not melt off. And carry face blotting towelettes.

LESSON NUMBER THREE | COMMIT

Fare la bella figura is not limited to young women either. I have seen many an older Italian woman doddering along, holding on to her companion for support in stilettos! Stilettos! They can barely walk anymore, but damn it if they aren’t going to look good. I will admit that I have yet to attain this level of fare la bella figura.

Lesson number three on achieving Italian style, you are never too old to care about how you look. The third secret to Italian style – commit to fare la bella figura for life.

The older women also love their hats, fur coats, scarves and handbags. I particularly like to watch the older ladies during the Christmas season as Italians dress up to do their Christmas shopping. At the beginning of December, the older Italian women put on their finest attire as they stroll around the main piazza and shopping streets showing off their coats, hats and handbags  It is a far different atmosphere than the images you see of people clawing and fighting over items at WalMart.  This is a slow, deliberate shopping experience.  A chance to show off your best face.

Another difference between Italy and the USA, no one in Italy is afraid of PETA. Fur and leather abound, particularly among the older crowd. Fur hats, fur coats, fur trimmed scarves, fur lined leather gloves, fur lined leather boots, leather pants, and leather skirts are commonplace.

LESSON NUMBER FOUR | TEACH THY STUDENTS WELL

Lesson number four on achieving Italian style, teach the males in your life the importance of fare le bella figura as well. Italian women are not alone in pursuing la bella figura. Italian men spend an equal amount of time on their appearance. Italian men’s clothes are often tailored. It is unusual to see baggy clothes on men here. Italian men also wear sweaters quite a bit. Not just pullover sweaters, but cardigans. And they like to roll up the cuffs of their pants, jeans, shorts.  Italian men wear scarves as often as women do and they pay a lot of attention to their shoes. They also carry bags made of beautiful leather – or what we would call a man purse, a ‘murse.’

Older men frequently wear suits, bow ties, fedoras, and a scarf. They dress this way all the time – just to go to the post office or the vegetable market.  And where the Italian women tend to be understated, Italian men have a flair for bold style. They are not afraid to wear colors and patterns. Lord knows they love a brightly colored pant.

I have observed the Italians for over three years now. I will admit that while I have learned a thing or two, I am still amazed at how they pull off la bella figura every single day. They make being stylish and elegant look effortless and easy. I still cannot navigate cobblestones in stilettos and I still do not dress up to run to the supermarket across the street, but, I have improved. I no longer wear flip flops.

Fare la bella figura is part of the Italian culture. It is expected, and I have come to appreciate it. The attention to style makes one feel a bit better when you are out and about. And it makes for great people watching.

The Italian author Beppe Severgnini summed it up best. “Being Italian is a full-time job. We never forget who we are, and we have fun confusing anyone who is looking on.”


The photos of Italian style are not my own. I got these off of the internet because it is not good form to take photos of strangers, but I assure you that I have seen some version of each of these outfits on a regular basis.

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The Liebster Award!

Niche Travel Design has been nominated for The Liebster Award!

I was nominated by A World in Reach for this peer award. For a somewhat new blogger like me, this is a special treat.  It’s always a great feeling to be recognized by your peers. Thank you, Sydney and A World in Reach.

What is the Liebster Award?

The Liebster Award is a peer to peer award, given to bloggers, by bloggers as a way to foster collaboration and support. What a nice idea.

I noticed a message board in my German friend’s house that said “liebe und respekt.”  I asked what liebe or liebster meant.  She told me it means dearest or kindest. Thus, bloggers being dear and kind to one another. This is an award I can get behind. I am always seeking advice from others and I am happy to promote the idea of collaboration. I strongly believe in the theory that what you give comes back to you.  

The Rules of Engagement

Once you’re nominated with the Liebster Award, you have to follow a few rules to celebrate your win and spread the award throughout the blogging community.

1. Thank the person who nominated you, and put a link to their blog on your blog.

2. Display the award on your blog.

3. Write a small post about what makes you passionate about blog posting.

4. Provide 10 random facts about yourself.

5. Answer the questions from your nominator and provide a fresh set of questions for those you nominate.

6. Nominate 5 – 10 blogs that you feel would enjoy blogging about this award.

7. List these rules in your post.

How I Began My Blogging Journey

I began blogging when I first moved from California to Parma, Italy in 2011.

When my daughter was a toddler she frequently made up words that sounded similar to the adult versions. She would say strawbellies instead of strawberries; froggy instead of foggy. One of the words she transposed was Parmesan. In her toddler mind, Parmesan cheese was Purple John cheese. For years our family asked each other to pass the Purple John cheese at the dinner table.

Imagine our surprise when we realized that we were moving to Parma, Italy – the birthplace of Purple John cheese.  Apparently, the universe has a sense of humor. It seemed like serendipity. What we did not know is that an international move is difficult. Life in another country is difficult. It is not all adventure.  I had 2 very sad children who did not want to move and leave the comfort of their home.

[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”lifted-both” width=”auto” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ]Read about the reality of an international move here.[/dropshadowbox]

All that being said, life in Italy was often quite funny because things were soooo different than what we were used to. Thus, my original blog, Purple John, began by me just telling friends about the difficulties and the funny stories that we encountered along the way.

[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”lifted-both” width=”auto” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ]Read funny stories about life in Italy in the drop-down menu here. [/dropshadowbox]

And of course, just when we were settled into life in Italy, the universe struck again and we had a second move to Malmö, Sweden. Once we moved and settled into Malmö, I toyed with the idea of reworking my past experience as a travel consultant and incorporating the blog as part of the business. The kids were older and they did not need me as much as they did in Italy. This last year I began my existing blog Niche Travel Design using my name and domain name from the travel business that I ran in the USA. So now my travel business has a blog attached to it.

My blog still occasionally includes funny ex-pat tales of excitement and woe, but now I am more focused on the business of travel. The funny thing, though . . . that little toddler that inspired my first blog name, she now works with me on the business.

At Niche Travel Design, our philosophy is that designing the perfect vacation is as much an art form as designing a home’s interior or a garden’s landscape. We curate a unique experience for each of our clients. 

We are experts in finding the best cup of coffee, the most interesting art gallery, the best place to sip Prosecco while watching the sunset, and the best accessories to make your adventure more comfortable.

Niche Travel Design is more than a travel blog. We are a community featuring stories of life abroad, cultural experiences, recipes, ideas, and tips for creating unique memories to last a lifetime. We also recommend products and services.

10 Random Things About Me

  1. I once sort of crashed a funeral. My friend was supposed to go and I was staying with her so I went too because it was celebrity filled. In the end, I felt like a heel and a looky-loo. People (even celebrities) were grieving. I don’t recommend it. Not my best moment.
  2. I always top off my gasoline, despite the warnings.
  3. I love Gene Kelly movies and I got to meet him once and had a conversation with him about his more obscure movies. It was amazing and he was so kind.
  4. I am secretly a Carpenters fan. I guess it is not a secret anymore. 
  5. I sing all the time in public even though I really shouldn’t.
  6. I once got into a car accident on the way home from a car accident and neither one was my fault. I know you don’t believe me, but it is true.
  7. Apparently, according to my family, I say Google incorrectly? Who knew?
  8. I hate, I mean really hate, The Pillsbury Doughboy. His voice makes my skin crawl.
  9. I once stayed at a “pensione” in Barcelona that was actually the host’s children’s room. He was clearing toys out of their bedroom. It was weird, but it was late and there was a train strike so I paid to sleep in a stranger’s kid’s bed.
  10. I generally don’t like chick flicks despite being a chick. I seem to be missing a gene or something.

A World In Reach’s Questions For Me

What is the most important lesson you’ve learned during your travels? That once one strips away all the cultural differences, we are all the same. We all just want safety, family, friends, love, and respect in our lives.

What’s your favorite part of traveling? Exploring and learning about a place. Finding off the beaten path things to do. I am a researcher and enjoy the discovery of new things to do, a great local restaurant, a specialty shop, an unusual experience in a typical tourist spot. Least favorite? The getting there bit. The airports, etc.  Ugh.

Do you collect any souvenirs from your travels? I used to collect art from each place but now I have too much. I had to stop. No more room to hang anything. We have also always collected ornaments for our Christmas tree. It is nice to remember our trips as we put up each ornament every year. Now I collect photographs and memories.

What is the most unique experience you’ve had with a local while traveling? Swimming with horses in Croatia. Just incredible.

[dropshadowbox align=”none” effect=”lifted-both” width=”auto” height=”” background_color=”#ffffff” border_width=”1″ border_color=”#dddddd” ]Read more about swimming with horses here. [/dropshadowbox]

If you could travel with one person you’ve never traveled with before, who would it be? Barack Obama. He is intelligent, funny, has done some cool stuff and met a bunch of interesting people. I’ll bet he has good stories. Plus, he gets V.I.P. treatment and if we were traveling together I’d get V.I.P. treatment too.  

How did you come up with your blog name? It was the name of my travel business in the USA. I focus on niche, unique, unusual travel experiences. I curate and design your trip for you.

What tip would you give to a new blogger? Learn all the technical stuff before you begin.

Is there a book or a movie that has inspired your wanderlust?  No. My wanderlust was developed as a child. Actually, I feel like it has always been there. 

What are the top 3 things on your bucket list? Africa – all of it!  Australia/New Zealand and Asia.

What is your biggest travel regret? I had a chance to go to Africa for a summer. I didn’t go because it wasn’t practical. I should have gone.

My Nominations for The Liebster Award

I have really enjoyed the Liebster Award process. I also enjoyed reading about each of these bloggers that I am nominating. I hope that you each take the time to read up on what they have to offer.

1. Divine Kabwe at beingyourselfblog.wordpress.com 

2. Diana Danciu at ourblindlife.com

3. Jenny Toney Bhatia of travelingpartyof4.com

4. Temeka Flack Green of worklifemommyhood.com

5. Heather Eyre of thefemalefactor.me

6. Jamie Joseph of wearefreeindeed.wordpress.com

7. Samantha Norman of SammiNormanFit.com

8. Louise Emerson of 12books.co.uk

9. Mallory Herrera of mamaonparade.com

10. Megan Henderson of thehendersonhouse.org

Questions For My Nominees

Since I have a travel blog, my questions are all about travel.

  1. Where would you go if money and time were not issues?
  2. What is the best advice you would give to new travelers?
  3. What is the one accessory that you cannot travel without – your phone and/or computer don’t count?
  4. Where is one place you would return over and over again? And why?
  5. Where is one place you’ve been but never want to return to? And why?
  6. What is the funniest travel mishap you’ve had?
  7. What is the scariest travel experience you’ve had?
  8. What is your favorite travel souvenir?
  9. What is your favorite local cuisine?
  10. What is your next destination?

Looking forward to reading my nominees’ answers and getting to know them better.

And once again, a BIG THANK YOU to A World In Reach for my nomination!

Everyone, please be sure to check out Sydney’s blog for ideas on budget travel. A World In Reach can provide you with all sorts of ideas on traveling on a budget.

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Italian Liqueurs | Day Drinking In Italy: The Italian White Russian.

ITALIAN LIQUEURS ARE NECESSARY | Our First Winter In Italy

Our first winter living in Italy was brutal. Snow for months.  My husband and I were snowbound, watching the movie, The Big Lebowski and dreaming of White Russians to keep us warm. A White Russian is a lovely concoction comprised of vodka, cream, and coffee flavored liqueur, Kahlua. The drink features prominently in the movie. Unfortunately, while Kahlua is very popular in the USA, it was impossible to find in Italy. Literally impossible. Our Big Lebowski dreams were shattered.

Then one day my husband walked in from work with a look on his face like a little boy with a frog in his pocket. He excitedly pulled out a bottle of Borghetti, a coffee based Italian liqueur. White Russians were back on the menu. And, we quickly realized that the regional Italian liqueurs, well, they are necessary to survive winter.

White Russian cocktail on the bar stand on rubber mat.
The classic White Russian cocktail. Photo credit: iStock Photos.

Now, after 2 or 3 White Russians,  you’d think that we would have been out cold. I am an insomniac, but my husband can literally sleep anywhere, at any time. Yet this night, no sleep was to be had. No sheep were being counted. At about 3:00 a.m., we were both wide awake with the edgy energy that only high amounts of caffeine have ever given me. We tossed. We turned. We tried to figure out why my husband couldn’t sleep. Eventually, it dawned on us to look at the Borghetti bottle.

ITALIAN INGREDIENTS | Hint, They Are Sticklers For Natural, Pure Ingredients. 

There it was right on the front of the bottle, “di vero caffe espresso.”  Arrgh. Our excitement had made us foolhardy. While Kahlua is a coffee “flavored” liqueur, Borghetti is made with pure espresso.  Italians do not believe in artificial ingredients. Not even in their liqueurs. We had essentially consumed 3 espressos each before bedtime.

ITALIAN COFFEE | Borghetti, Not Suitable For Evening

We concluded that Borghetti is only suitable for day drinking. Borghetti is a day drink because one cannot drink it in the evening and expect to get any sleep. If Borghetti bested my sleep connoisseur husband, a normal person doesn’t stand a chance. 

Borghetti is delicious. I like it even better than Kahlua. It has less of a sugary taste and more of a strong coffee flavor. So the conundrum. The stuff is tasty but there is no way we can drink after 12:00 noon and how many times a year does one sit around drinking during the daytime? Hum . . . when could we consume this lovely liqueur?

We decided that Borghetti is the perfect Christmas morning drink. A little Borghetti in with some cream and Nat King Cole singing Christmas carols is a pretty damn near perfect way to start your day.

Two Christmas gnomes with a bottle of Borghetti.
The Italian liqueur, Borghetti. The necessary ingredient for an Italian Christmas White Russian.

ITALIAN RECIPES | The Italian White Russian

Despite the name, the White Russian was not invented in Russia. I suspect that the alleged inventor so named it due to the inclusion of vodka, but I have no proof (pun intended) of that.

Legend has it that Gustave Tops, a Belgian bartender, not a Russian, created the cocktail in 1949 at the Hotel Metropole in Brussels. The drink was quite popular initially and eventually spread across the globe. In the USA, the concoction hit the height of its popularity in the 1970s. Today, not too many people drink them and it is considered a retro cocktail.

Our recipe adds a new twist with the addition of the espresso liqueur. In our house, we have cross pollinated 2 cultures and now our cocktail’s official moniker is Il Russo Bianco di Natale Italiano or the Italian Christmas White Russian.  

Makes one drink:

  1. 2 oz vodka.
  2. 1 oz Borghetti
  3. 1/2 oz whole milk or heavy cream.
  4. Ice.

Buon Natale a Tutti!